A Quick Unfussy Breakfast

Today’s post wasn’t supposed to be about eggs. It was supposed to be about beer, since last night I gathered with several intrepid local Yelpers at Albany’s new watering hole, The City Beer Hall.

On a weekday evening it was a magnificent place to hang out with like-minded friends, drink a few interesting beers, and eat some atypical bar food. I had really hoped to have some remarkable new beers to tell you about, but there is no guarantee when trying new things that one will find something stunning. So the search continues.

I will mention briefly that I was pleasantly surprised with the free pizzas they give you with every pint. It was significantly better than some pizzas I’ve had that are twice the price. All kidding aside, they cook those things right on the oven floor! Take note, Paesan’s. And it gives them a deliciously charred bottom crust.

But yesterday was also remarkable because not just one, but two prominent local bloggers were tweeting about microwaving their morning eggs for the sake of expediency. One had even written recently about her desire to cook more. So while I offered a few helpful suggestions in 140 characters at the time, today the subject gets the full fussy treatment.

Here is the roadmap to a hot, quick and wholesome homemade breakfast.

1)    Set the coffee maker the night before.
2)    Stagger downstairs and pour a cup of coffee.
3)    Turn the stove on to medium high.
4)    Slap a well-seasoned 10” cast iron skillet on the burner to preheat.
5)    Take out bread, butter, and two eggs.
6)    Take out a bowl and a fork.
7)    Crack eggs in a bowl and pick out the shells.
8)    Use the fork to cut off a tablespoon of butter and put it in the pan.
9)    Put the slice of bread in the toaster.
10)  Mix eggs with salt and pepper, and pour into melted butter.
11)  Use the same fork to stir the eggs around in the pan, scraping the bottom.
12)  Take pan off heat, and let the eggs cook a bit more in the hot pan.
13)  Get the toast.
14)  Plate the eggs and consider eating them with a fresh fork.

This may look like a long list of steps, but they include every single detail of what you need to do to make breakfast in mere moments. The thing with cooking is that over time, with enough practice on a single dish, not only will your food improve, but you will also get faster.

Seriously, two eggs are scrambled in a pan in less than a minute. If you are cooking your eggs longer than that, you are overcooking them. The secret is to move them around, and use plenty of butter.

Yes, some have suggested Pam is an okay substitute. And perhaps Pam will prevent your eggs from sticking to an under-seasoned pan, but it will foil your attempts to make scrambled eggs. Part of what happens to eggs as they get scrambled is that the cooking fat actually works its way into the curds of the egg. This hot fat that surrounds the delicate egg batter not only makes it more delicious, but also helps it cook faster.

When time is of the essence, seconds matter.

Maybe one day I’ll try to race a microwave in an egg-cooking contest. But until then I’m going to say that there is no reason to ever cook an egg in a microwave. It will not be nearly as good, and it will not save you any meaningful amount of time in comparison to cooking it in a skillet.

Sure, you’ll have a dirty skillet to wipe out. But you can do what I do. Hide the dirty pan in the oven, until you get a chance to clean it later in the day. Or maybe you can do what I really do, which is hide the dirty pan in the oven, and wait until your spouse comes home and cleans it later in the day.

If you want to know how Cooks Illustrated says to cook a “perfect scrambled egg” you will need to subscribe to their site or the magazine. But it’s a good bit more complex than what I laid out above. And while my method may be rather simple it is delicious. The trick is to get good eggs and good butter, and don’t forget to add a generous amount of salt.

Let me know if you have any problems, and we can tackle them together. Because everyone should be able to make a quick and delicious scrambled egg.