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Confessions of a Born Again Bachelor

January 14, 2015

That should really be, Confessions of a Born Again Bachelor (with kids).

Mrs. Fussy is away for the week, in Austin of all places. And I got a text from her last night taunting me about where she’s eating. It was the Salty Sow. The chef, as fate would have it, seems to have grown up in Albany. Small world. Anyhow, it was described to me as the best meal she’s had in over a year.

Once upon a time, when Mrs. Fussy would leave the first thing I would do was break out the onions. Actually, I still do that. And all of those healthy habits that we typically have for family dinner, are tossed out the window.

Usually we eat fairly low on the food chain. Meals are made up primarily of whole grains, legumes and vegetables with meat added sparingly for flavor. When people ask me how I can maintain my weight even though I write a weekly donut feature and eat fried foods with reckless abandon, I point to the fiber rich staples of my diet.

But on Sunday I made steaks. No vegetables.

Well, that’s not entirely true. I heated up some baked beans for the kids, just in case they didn’t like the big slab of grassfed beef I put on the center of the plate. And it’s a good thing too, because they didn’t. Not even with barbecue sauce. I even offered them ketchup, but they just weren’t interested.

That’s fine. More for me. And I suppose technically I had a vegetable too. Really, I just deglazed the cast iron skillet with some butter and half of an onion (cut into slivers). I don’t know if you can still call it a vegetable after it has been turned into a sauce with the collected meat juices from resting the steaks.

Man, that was good though. And I had fruit too. Granted, it was in the form of red wine.

I’ve been eating leftover pizza for breakfast. Every day I’ve had more than one fried thing at lunch. On Monday it was fish fry, cheese fries, and onion rings. On Tuesday it was mozzarella sticks and an eggplant parm torpedo.

Monday night I even had a fried empanada de pollo to accompany my cheese stuffed pupusa. The kids ate pupusas too. While Little Miss Fussy wasn’t crazy about them–despite being filled with beans–her brother was a big fan.

Tuesday night I gave the kids some more baked beans, this time with a couple of hot dogs cut up in them, while I ate the leftover steak, onions, and more red wine.

Today, I’ve got to take it easy. It’s probably a bad idea to make more ribeyes for dinner tonight. Seriously, I have to say that out loud, because I’m mighty tempted to keep eating like a jerk. It’s so easy and so delicious to just sear a piece of meat and put it on a plate. I could be moderate and just make one steak.

No. No. No.

And really, I should be getting my next dozen donuts today. But I think I’ll do better to take the day off. Maybe even move around a little bit. And by move around, I mean walk through a grocery store replenishing the pantry supplies. Maybe while I’m there I can even pick up a vegetable or two.

4 Comments leave one →
  1. EPT permalink
    January 14, 2015 12:12 pm

    Bravo! That’s what to do on a bachelors week. I’ll lean toward a LARGE steak, usually with a nice demi glace, wicked rich mashes potatoes and creamed spinach…Hmmm sounds like a steak house dinner, so what’s the problem?

  2. January 14, 2015 2:31 pm

    I’ve never even heard of pupusas before! Sounds yummy though. I giggled a little when that link went to your Yelp review. And, glad to hear I am not the only person in the world with kids who don’t like steak.

  3. Sarah M. permalink
    January 16, 2015 2:33 pm

    Mrs. Fussy! Salty Sow?! No bueno! If she’s on that part of Manor Road, Dai Due and East Side Cafe are far better bets, and don’t need to hide their multitudes of sins under piles of bacon.

  4. January 16, 2015 8:40 pm

    “When people ask me how I can maintain my weight even though I write a weekly donut feature and eat fried foods with reckless abandon, I point to the fiber rich staples of my diet.” – Or just good genes? And no working out, either. I work out 6-7 days a week in order to maintain my foodie and beer snob habit. :P

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