Skip to content

My Morning Muslim Ritual

December 15, 2015
tags: , ,

So Chanukah is over. Another one is in the books. And this year’s celebration was a doozy. As far as I’m concerned, we can put “Happy Holidays” to bed and start wishing everyone a “Merry Christmas and happy new year.”

It’s a strange time in America right now. All the major religious groups are feeling persecuted. I’m not sure about how the Buddhists are feeling these days, but they’ve always seemed to be a pretty go with the flow kind of bunch. I think I can say that. My cousin is a Buddhist.

To make matters more challenging, people are arming themselves to the teeth, going out in public with their weapons, and scaring the bejeezus out of those of us who are uncomfortable around guns. People are also killing each other as they “stand their ground” instead of trying to deescalate a situation without using deadly force. Police are doing this too. I question if a 21 year old college student really had to be killed when he was breaking car windows with an axe.

Perhaps even more upsetting than the acts themselves are the public’s reaction to them. There’s just a lot of fear and anger percolating in our society, and I’m not quite sure where all of it is coming from. As Stevie sang a long time ago, “Love’s in need of love today.” And I’m feeling the need to contribute some right away.

Lately, anti-Muslim sentiment has been on the rise, so let’s start there.

Like the Jews, Muslims have some unfortunate dietary laws. Even though we are both told to avoid pork, somehow the Muslims get to eat lobster with a clean conscience. Lucky. I have no idea how that happened, and how we Jews got shafted on the shellfish.

Although we do get to drink alcohol, which is nice. The booze helps to lessen the guilt for all the bacon covered shrimp we’ve been eating at the company Christmas party.

But I digress.

What I really wanted to do today was share the one thing that I’m most grateful about from Muslim culture. Algebra is high up there, but this has to do with food. And it’s something that has become a really really important part of my life. And not just my life, but the lives of countless Americans. Even the islamophobic.


Did you know that coffee was a Muslim invention? I had no idea. Can you imagine what America would look like in the morning without its coffee? Holy cow, that’s a scary thought.

I’m forever thankful for the discovery and cultivation of coffee. It’s the blood that courses through my veins. It’s the thing that keeps me from dying in a fiery wreck behind the wheel of a large automobile. It’s what wipes the sleep from my eyes in the morning, and gives me the motivation to start the day. And this may be a little bit TMI, but without coffee, I don’t know if I could poop.

So do me a solid. The next time you see someone you think might be Muslim, remember your morning cup of joe, and think a happy thought. And if you’re so moved, you can even hum a few lines of Macklemore. Not his latest kickass epic about driving mopeds downtown, but the rap ballad “Same Love.”

Whatever God you believe in
We come from the same one
Strip away the fear
Underneath it’s all the same love

In the spirit of Christmas, I think the idea of spreading joy and love is more important now than ever. And if you aren’t sure there’s a need to stand up to hate, there are a few not so fun links that you can check out about words and their consequences.

6 Comments leave one →
  1. December 15, 2015 11:11 am

    One of your best. Thank you.

  2. Cheryl permalink
    December 15, 2015 11:45 am

    Well put my friend, well put.

  3. carrie permalink
    December 15, 2015 12:20 pm

    That is lovely. But please don’t follow up a poop comment with “do me a solid”. ;)

  4. December 15, 2015 1:39 pm

    How about a few links to recommended establishments we can give money to that are serving or selling Halal food?

  5. December 15, 2015 5:19 pm

    Guns make you uncomfortable, but axe wielding drunken adults are pretty much just ok with you… Got it.

    • December 15, 2015 5:33 pm

      It was more like a hand axe. I’d much rather take my chances with a drunk idiot who has something sharp, than someone with a tool that can be instantly lethal from a distance away.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: